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Coupé Ownership: The Rules
#654388
29/07/2008 21:40
29/07/2008 21:40
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ChimChim
Unregistered
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ChimChim
Unregistered
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From my three years ownership I think that these are the rules of Coupé ownership as expressed on these pages! 1a - Paint. This must remain a one stock colour with no bold graphics, highlights or be two tone.The only exception being if the colour used is from another Italian car maker and is of a cool hue. 1b - Paint. Whatever colour you Coupé is, it is the best colour and all other colours are inferior and you must remind others of this at every opportunity. (But you all know that Portofino Blue is the best really) 2 - No Abarth badges. Penalty - you will have the pi$$ taken out of you. 3 - No Ferrari badges. Penalty - You will be sent to the naughty step and made to watch Pulling Power. 4 - No spoilers. Penalty - you will be made to watch Mike Brewer trying to sell cars on Auto Trader. 5 - A 16v model is better than a 20v. 6 - A 20v model is better than a 16v. 7 - You must flash your headlights and/or wave when you see another Coupé - then report it on the Coupé spotting section of the Forum ASAP. Add more as you see fit.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654391
29/07/2008 21:51
29/07/2008 21:51
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coupedave
Unregistered
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coupedave
Unregistered
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8. check the oil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654393
29/07/2008 21:53
29/07/2008 21:53
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davejones81
Unregistered
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davejones81
Unregistered
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1a - Paint. This must remain a one stock colour with no bold graphics, highlights or be two tone.The only exception being if the colour used is from another Italian car maker and is of a cool hue. 1b - Paint. Whatever colour you Coupé is, it is the best colour and all other colours are inferior and you must remind others of this at every opportunity. (But you all know that Portofino Blue is the best really) 2 - No Abarth badges. Penalty - you will have the pi$$ taken out of you. 3 - No Ferrari badges. Penalty - You will be sent to the naughty step and made to watch Pulling Power. 4 - No spoilers. Penalty - you will be made to watch Mike Brewer trying to sell cars on Auto Trader. 5 - A 16v model is better than a 20v. 6 - A 20v model is better than a 16v. 7 - You must flash your headlights and/or wave when you see another Coupé - then report it on the Coupé spotting section of the Forum ASAP. 8 - Check your oil (Before anyone else adds it! EDIT: Dammit! beaten to it!)
9 - No 'Turbo' or 'Coupe' badges from Halfrauds. Penalty - you will look a dick.
10 - If a kid says "Nice Ferrari", say nothing other than "Thank You". We were all kids once, one day they'll realise its better than that. (Well, the 20vt anyway..... He winks while invoking rule 6)
Last edited by davejones81; 29/07/2008 21:55.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654409
29/07/2008 22:24
29/07/2008 22:24
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the_angry_monkey
Unregistered
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the_angry_monkey
Unregistered
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11 - The Coupe must be incorporated into the family holiday photo at least once each holiday
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654418
29/07/2008 22:31
29/07/2008 22:31
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Shifty
Unregistered
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Shifty
Unregistered
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12. You must always panic and think the worst when the engine makes an unusual noise in traffic, coupe paranoia rules!
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654436
29/07/2008 22:53
29/07/2008 22:53
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Scooby
Unregistered
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Scooby
Unregistered
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13. Once sold you must repeatedly tell the Coupe community it's the worst car ever made
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: sugerbear]
#654447
29/07/2008 23:17
29/07/2008 23:17
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MABR
Unregistered
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MABR
Unregistered
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4b - If you must have a spoiler it HAS to be the factory / Zender one.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654467
29/07/2008 23:40
29/07/2008 23:40
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Mrs_LickyL
Unregistered
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Mrs_LickyL
Unregistered
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16) If your coop is standing in a traffic jam for longer than 12 seconds you must turn off the engine to prevent overheating (more coop paranoia)! 17a) Wherever possible, taking up 2 parking spaces is mandatory 17b) Anyone coming within 2 feet of the car is asking to be given the evil eye unless they are part of the coop fraternity of course
Last edited by Mrs_LickyL; 29/07/2008 23:41.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654473
29/07/2008 23:46
29/07/2008 23:46
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eldinho
Unregistered
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eldinho
Unregistered
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18) There is no point trying to use the horn in anger, as by the time you have found the thing the other party is too far away to hear it!
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654499
30/07/2008 00:35
30/07/2008 00:35
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painterman
Unregistered
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painterman
Unregistered
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19) always feel free to smoke as the ashtray is always open 20)when asked why the brakes squeel always reply the discs need bedding in 21)always remember your coop is faster than anything else on the road especialy when in third gear 22)the white smoke on start up is just the condensation 23)when asked, you bought the car for its styling rather than reliabilty 24)never carry loose change you will only loose it as your arse slides around on the seats 25)when asked about your good thigh muscles, its due to trying to stop your arse sliding all over the seats. painterman
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: darmtb]
#654503
30/07/2008 00:41
30/07/2008 00:41
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Ary
Unregistered
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Ary
Unregistered
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hahaha. Funniest thread in long time. Keep it coming.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654512
30/07/2008 01:04
30/07/2008 01:04
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MattW
Unregistered
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MattW
Unregistered
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27) Give the car a full blast through the rev range at least once a week to make sure it "feels" as fast as it should. If it doesnt, isolate a noise that you dont think it should be making and put two and two together, there are plenty to choose from! 28) If unsure which type of oil to use, start a new thread in the general maintenance section (or one of the surrounding ones) and await friendly advice and assistance.
Last edited by MattW; 30/07/2008 01:12.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: daithi28]
#654523
30/07/2008 01:44
30/07/2008 01:44
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Truffle
Unregistered
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Truffle
Unregistered
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30) Group Buys will always take place the moment you have no money.
31)For every item you tick off of your 'to-do' list, 3 more are added.
32) All unknown and unwanted squeaks and rattles can be fixed by a single button. Vol +
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654530
30/07/2008 02:50
30/07/2008 02:50
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DidCoop
Unregistered
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DidCoop
Unregistered
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33) Be prepared for problems! 34) Any women that have no clue about your car, tell them it's a mini-Ferrari
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654543
30/07/2008 08:43
30/07/2008 08:43
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SimonCoupe
Unregistered
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SimonCoupe
Unregistered
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35. Handbrake turns are a myth. 36. The man who invented three point turns didn't own a 20VT.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654557
30/07/2008 09:40
30/07/2008 09:40
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symonh2000
Unregistered
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symonh2000
Unregistered
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37. Scars on your hands and arms from working on your coupe ARE attractive to members of the opposite sex.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654558
30/07/2008 09:41
30/07/2008 09:41
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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,285 Manchester
GraemeC
Competition Level
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Competition Level
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,285
Manchester
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37) If you need some new tyres, start a new thread in general maintencance
38) Get your thermostat replaced bi-anually
39) Always explain to people the reason you've gone the long way round is because the coupe cant go over speedbumps/make it round mini-roundabouts
It is hard to understand how a cemetery can raise burial rates and blame it on the cost of living
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: GraemeC]
#654578
30/07/2008 10:20
30/07/2008 10:20
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AdamGT
Unregistered
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AdamGT
Unregistered
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40) Whenever you have parked your coupe, turn around at least twice to admire it while walking away.
41) Keep a designated space next to your front door for a bottle of oil.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654582
30/07/2008 10:26
30/07/2008 10:26
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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 33,677 Berlin
barnacle
Club Member 18 - ex-Minister without Portfolio
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Club Member 18 - ex-Minister without Portfolio
Forum Demigod
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 33,677
Berlin
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43) Remember that all the inferior coupes are devolved forms of the epitome of excellence - the 16v NA. 44) All coupes should have a widget
Last edited by barnacle; 30/07/2008 10:27. Reason: curse your numbering, Nigel!
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: ]
#654586
30/07/2008 10:29
30/07/2008 10:29
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suba
Unregistered
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suba
Unregistered
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42. Leave a lr of oil in the boot.
42. Leave a toolkit in the boot.
43. Have every spare fuse you can think of in the glove box.
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Re: Coupé Ownership: The Rules
[Re: Nigel]
#654597
30/07/2008 10:40
30/07/2008 10:40
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MattW
Unregistered
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MattW
Unregistered
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47. Minor chips and scratches must always be rectified by a full respray.
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