You know when

You know two people in your office are having an affair, one is single (divorce) the other has 3 kiddies and is married.
I'm pretty certain he's done it a fee times with colleagues before and I have dropped hits that he's being a dick but they've fallen on deaf ears obviously...
He's worked here a fair while, she's a student placement (albeit an older student, late 20's)

Should something be said or do I leave it?

I'd be inclined to steer well clear; not because I think it's ok, but because the dick will carry on being a dick regardless (probably) and the student presumably has underlying problems with her marriage leading her to behave like this, so will (probably) not listen. All you'll gain is their anger for sticking your nose in.
Do none of his other victims have any words of wisdom for the latest one?

Personally, other than dropping a hint confirming what you think of it (as you've already done) I'd stay waaaay away from the situation. IMHO.

Both other victims have since resigned.... They've been spotted by 2 different members of my team this time round, don't believe they're aware of this either....

Difficult one. Personally I would want to do something, however I have done in the past and feel equipped to do so. It is not something I can blithely recommend others to do. Sticking your oar in could make the situation worse. There is also little point dropping hints - you either get involved or you don't.

If you wanted to do something can I suggest a different approach to confrontation or hints, albeit one that may require more time and commitment. Get to know the person who is married, talk to them about their family and how they met their other half, invite them and their spouse (and kids) to things with you and your other half, get to know their family and become a part of strengthening their relationship and helping her refocus her attention and help the workplace become somewhere where she is not isolated from her husband and family, but they have a connection with (which can happen even from something just as simple as talking in the workplace about them).

My position on this would be to leave well alone. Not my business! I know that sounds kinda rude. But what maybe happening here is a emotive subject for all people involved. Even more reason to steer clear IMO

Emjay, I worked with the guy for 4 years so I know him quite well. Previously these affairs have been lesser noted, this one is fair too obvious.

I know what you mean Phil, it's just hard to sit back and watch...

My best mate was having affair with his secretary he then made her pregnant which developed into living a double life. 2 years later he made her pregnant again (don't ask). Almost from day one I had to keep this secret. Everytime I saw his wife it was so hard not to tell her. 6 years later his wife noticed a message on his mobile from the other woman. Then all hell broke out. Looking back I'm pleased I didn't tell her because I would of got involved and that's not a good place to be. In the end she understood why I hadn't told her, I also managed to stay friends with both of them.

Bottom line DON'T GET INVOLVED

leave well alone, you will not be thanked

Muzzie as you say you know him reasonably well,take him to one side and tell him he is being a dick then walk away and say nowt to anyone.

If not leave alone as others have said.
Good luck.

Agree, leave "well" alone.

Can see Emjay's POV though and as BM says after knowing the chap so long you could feel "guilty" not to take some action which you kind of feel responsible for.

But I think that is easier to see from your side - and even if your action may seem timely or convenient for you it doesn't necessarily mean it's timely/convenient for the other party.

Unless you are his parent then there's not a lot you should be doing.

If his way (and hers - you may not know fully her conscious levels of awareness?) of being an adult is by being idiots then so be it.

And what of course would interfering do, to someone who seems to have that way as his/her life mission ?.

Stopping this one will only make the next one happen sooner ????.

All very valid points, I can feel an overwhelming "leave the dick to it" theme.
There are underlying issues for me though:

He seems to be on self destruct, I've thought this for a while and it seems to be snowballing.

Usually there is an underlying reason for things to happen
Rich, powerful bloke young flirty thing blah blah blah.
That's not him, so I'm not sure how the situation has occurred. Previous ladies it made some sense, this one doesn't...

My main worry is he's in a role through internal experience, not through qualifications and would be down at least 30% pay working else where. As this attempt to boost his ego or whatever it is is far more public knowledge the chances are it will damage his career, he has 3 kids and a wife to support, I don't want to see him totally messing it all up!

Then tell him straight, and if he doesn't listen you can sleep easier knowing you did at least try and help.........

...... or leave it as it is and let him make his own mistakes as some people can't be told no matter what you say.

This, none of your business

Just show him this thread.......


That should do it

Roy

Here's something for you to ponder over!

I've left him to it.
They've planted daffodils together today....

Update :

Last 2 Fridays I've heard him ring his wife to say he'll be late, then he leaves on time.
Tonight he runs out of a meeting, panics around and rushes out. I followed 10 minutes later to find her car pulling out of the train station (he gets train home) and who's sat in the passenger seat?? Yep it's him.

I was in the left lane, she was in the right. The lights went red and I had to wait a good few minutes, strangely the road next to me was empty as she left half a car length behind me so as not to come level.
On driving past them he saw me and I saw him, although he hunched over and tried to hide....

I also think he's getting a lift in so getting the train from home to her nearest station.
The daffodils are also like children to them... It's a little scary